Most of the Hindu mourning rituals performed are designed to promote the free expression of emotions. Are you sure he is dead?, You are lucky you have one other child who is alive!, I used to tell her to eat less and exercise more often. LinkedIn. While it can be difficult to know just what to say to someone who has experienced a death, many people who have experienced a death appreciate being contacted. Weapons do not cut this Spirit, fire does not burn it, water does not make it wet, and the wind does not make it dry. Loud conversation on unrelated topics. The funeral ceremony is conducted at the place of the cremation. Some people in India may denounce being Hindu, but their lifestyle may suggest that they still live like a traditional Hindu. Traditional Hindu funeral rituals dictate that the mukhagni is only attended by men. Find out what to do and discover resources to help you cope. The act of explaining to the son or daughter or other close relatives about the good nature and help rendered by the deceased and give condolences to them is called Enquiring about the grief. For a parent, sons and daughters are equally precious. Viewing the body is not mandatory, but is usually considered respectful if the casket is open and displayed near the family. Hindu Rituals for Death and Grief - Beliefnet If you're completely overwhelmed by the prospect, and feel that you must decline, it's okay to do so. On behalf of my family, I want to say how sorry we are for your loss. It is appropriate to visit the bereaved before the shraddha ceremony and attend the service. The only exceptions to this obligation are when the expression of condolence is simply a printed form with no personal message, or when the writer asks that his or her note not be acknowledged (a thoughtful thing to do when writing a close friend, or when someone you know well will receive a great number of condolences). New threads and replies may not be made here. For some, it can be a sense of awkwardnessa fear of saying or doing something inappropriate, or an aversion to seeing grief-stricken people. The important thing is that you have received comfort from the many who have helped you. Visiting in Person | Condolences | eCondolence.com Following are a collection of questions and answers about bereavement to help guide you during difficult times. Sometimes, guests also attend this ceremony. Please, search or browse our comprehensive online etiquette articles. If there is no relationship with the family, introduce yourself and briefly explain your relationship with the deceased. Exchange stories about your loved one. We are not attorneys and are not providing you with legal Support the family with thoughtful and appropriate Hindu sympathy meals, baskets and memorials. She'll let you know, when you ask, whether or not she wants to see you and or needs anything. Today, many take their ashes to a nearby place to their home. A common blunder by well-meaning visitors is to try and compare with their own limited experiences. The body of the deceased should be released as quickly as possible to enable the family to prepare for the funeral. Emily Post training and consultation services are available for groups, businesses and individuals. I am sorry for your loss. We have the perfect wedding, graduation or housewarming gift for someone special in your life. During times of grief, everyone wants to say or do the right thing, the loving thing, the appropriate thing, but it isn't always clear what that is. It is proper to visit and be with the family during this time. There is a tendency to judge whether the person deserved to die the way he or she did. Brief words like I am sorry for your loss or You are in our thoughts and prayers are both meaningful and comforting. There, husbands and wives increasingly share household roles as dual-earners. Memorial Day for Divorced Parents | Holiday Visitation Schedules Will it be a private or open service? We pray that Lord Krishna gives you great strength to travel through all of this suffering. In many rural areas of India, gender inequalities still exist where the men adopt the head of household position. There is a Mukhagni ceremony where the family is given one last look at the deceased. And while most of the information provided above mixes trust with credible sources, theres such variety to the Hindu culture and faith systems that what works in one scenario may not work in another. Complete Guide to Hindu Funerals - TFS Funeral Flowers Singapore If your relationship to the bereaved or the person who died is more casual, it may be best to wait until the wake, funeral or memorialservice, or after the funeral to reach out. Now you can focus on leaving a legacy instead of a mess. Offer specific assistance: "I'm going to the grocery. Sleep is a basic bodily need, and lack of it can take a person down in no time. 2. There is a process of letting the deceased go and telling them goodbye with prayers and songs. The guests should expect to see the body, offer condolences to the bereaved family, and take a seat quietly. During subsequent visits, suggestions can be offered, but only when sought by the family. A Hindu priest is an officiant, who presides over all Hindu funeral rites. If you don't feel comfortable having your daughter view an open casket, skip the visiting hours and simply attend the service. Visitors are expected to bring fruit. Amen. Amy Wolkenhauer, BA in English/Creative Writing, https://www.indiatoday.in/information/story/deepest-condolence-messages-very-helpful-in-grief-1657386-2020-03-19, Hindu death traditions, rituals & beliefs. What to Write in a Sympathy Card for a Hindu | Cake Blog And unlike a phone call or a personal visit, e-mail doesn't require an immediate response from the recipient. Although some people may attend the cremation ceremony, non-Hindus are not allowed to participate in the mukhagni ceremony. Customs vary by tradition, but are conducted by a local priest and involve prayers, scripture readings and chanting. (Bhagavad Gita, 2.23-24). I will be attending the funeral of a Hindu colleague. Those can include: During these thirteen days, the family and friends of the deceased are given the freedom to express their grief rather than keep it bottled up inside. As hard as it can be to believe, some overly curious visitors have the tendency to interrogate the family about the cause of death. A Hindu priest will be invited to visit and to purify the house with incense, prayers and mantra. No two families and no two deaths are the same; it is therefore a pointless exercise. The closer your relationship to the bereaved or the person who died, the sooner you'll want to reach out. There is often an emphasis on white flowers. For many people who have experienced a death, it can be helpful to know that their closest friends and family are thinking of them and are available to help. Medicine is not an exact science, and the human body is not a machine that has replaceable parts or even an instruction manual. Whether we are comfortable with it or not, visiting bereaved families is part of living in society. Work from your dream country on a remote visa, A peek into where heads of various countries reside across the globe, This Diwali, try our tasty banana pudding recipe, Heal Thy Self | Early warning signs you could be in an abusive relationship, On yoga day, Krishnaprabha is an inspiration. E-mail is a immediate way to reach out and say, "I'm sorry. If you knew him, some kind words about himperhaps an anecdotewould mean a lot. Whether you are going to a, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Parent, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Sibling, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Friend, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Partner or Spouse, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Child. Medical decision making is among the most complex tasks known to man; and not all decisions lead to a positive outcome, although taken in good faith. However, they can participate in the chanting of mantras taking place thereafter. And if you plan on visiting themyoull spend more time in silence rather than offering condolences. Common blunders while visiting the bereaved: 1. Such tasks can include arranging for the ambulance, delivering food, cleaning the house, doing the shopping, taking care of paperwork, keeping smaller children occupied and assisting with funeral arrangements. Decide upon the best way to get the word out to friends and relatives about the service. You and your wife are well poised to take over your family. Beliefnet is a lifestyle website providing feature editorial content around the topics of inspiration, spirituality, health, wellness, love and family, news and entertainment. After bereavement, a person goes through denial, anger, bargaining, depressionand finally acceptancethese stages take time. During the thirteen-day period of mourning following the death, the presence of friends and family helps create positive karma to help prepare the soul for its next incarnation. I remember my neighbour had a much more terrible time with the same disease. Sharma, A. Family members have an open invitation to attend the service. 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She may depend on you entirely or she may wish to participate in the planning and have you take care of the details. As author Arvind Sharma writes, Hinduism is not a thing; it is a process. He would more or less characterize Hinduism as a method or temperament. Are you sure you want to Unsubscribe from Malayala Manorama News letter/ Alert. There is no official time frame for writing notes of appreciation to those who have extended their condolences and kindness to you. Not attending religious functions or celebrations. Drop her a note periodically, or even an e-mail, to let her know you're thinking of her. Simple condolences are universally acceptable. It also conveys an understanding that while there is a cycle to life, there is only one reality. It is important to identify a persons religious inclinations at the start of their care and to find out what they need when approaching the end of life.